The Enlightened Bisexual Male

Just what is an enlightened bisexual male?


It’s not likely you can pick him out in a crowd.  He’ looks much like any other man you run across everyday.  Certainly he’s someone’s son.  He may be someone’s brother, husband, father, cousin or uncle.  He may be your neighbor, your best friend’s husband, your colleague at the office.  Chances are you like him, though you probably don’t know he’s bisexual.  You like him because he’s friendly, because he smiles a lot, because he’s interesting.  You admire him because he’s objective, accepting, considerate, upbeat, self-conscious and seems to have identified the important things in life.


Inside his head is a world most people aren’t aware of, perhaps no one.  He sees colors many men don’t see, hears poetry most men don’t hear, understands human nature in a way most men can’t comprehend.  He has gotten past the onslaughts imposed by society, the indoctrinations hammered into him by politics, parents, social codes and the church.  He celebrates his unique freedoms, privately, though he recognizes  life’s greatest luxury is having someone to share his secrets with, someone who identifies with them, appreciates them, or at least someone who understands and accepts them.

He’s likely to fall in love with a woman; he knows instinctually a woman’s enormous capacity for love.  He may not understand all of her perspectives, but he delights in the fact she has them.  He falls in love with her because she inspires him, teaches him, she sees in him things everyone else sees and things they don’t, she provides him with entrees from the menu of life that he would not want to live without.


The enlightened male sleeps with his wife nude; he couldn’t imagine it any other way, nor could she.  He sleeps close to her, a leg draped over hers, an arm over her chest, a hand cupping one of her breasts or perhaps resting between her legs.  More often than not, this is his favorite time of day: falling asleep with her, holding her, resting his eyes on her when he awakes the next morning.


He recognizes male beauty.  From time to time he sees a another man that gives him flights of fantasy.  A man in passing, or standing in line in front of him at the supermarket checkout, or stepping out of a delivery truck.  Sometimes he imagines what it would be like to know this man, to touch him or see him undressed, only to smile and assume these kinds of feelings are almost certainly not mutual.  Still, he can imagine a great friend, a confidant, a buddy to spend time with.  He can imagine being carried away on the way the man smells, a touch of the lips, a caress, a special very unique kind of intimacy.


If he’s not married or committed, he may have such a friend, a lifelong buddy who knows him better than anyone else.  It’s entirely possible he will fall in love with this man and spend the rest of his life with him.  Instead of a man and woman holding hands as they walk down the street, it will be two men walking side-by-side, exchanging knowing glances.  Instead of resting his head between two soft breasts, he will rest it on the pectoral muscle of a firm chest.

He knows the value of a good novel, a movie with human drama instead of silly special effects, a song sung from the heart with passion, paintings that take you to different times and places, the wonders of Mother Nature, a special friend.  He will most likely live a significant part of his life in that private world inside his head.


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7 thoughts on “The Enlightened Bisexual Male

  1. I have been happily married for 45 years with good sex, but in my retirement discovered and acted upon my desire for same-sex experimentation. Now, I am happily in a same-sex relationship with a married man of 38 years, which I do not describe as infidelity, but an amplification of my sexuality. More like spreading my love to two or more children.

  2. Awesome post! I’m 17 years old and I’m bisexual… reading this post I can feel that be bisexual is a gift that almost all do not have because we have the good things from the males and females. Really I’m thankful for the things I have…

  3. I wanted to thank you for this post. As a young man who has recently come to the discovery that I am Bisexual. It was comforting to read an article that expresses many of the same thoughts I have had my self.

  4. What an amazing summary of what I have been feeling for years! Incredible insight and well written! It is difficult to love being with both sexes and each has different meaning, but both so significant!

  5. And that is what it is, as a male and a bisexual male with that full yearning and deep love for women and; that loving intuitive kinship and masculine attraction for men, our physical, emotional, spiritual and intellectual beauty, of men we know how we each feel, and that is beautiful, sweeping away all pretense and falsity in its sincerity,  allowing us to fully bloom. Thankyou Martin. With love. Julian. 

  6. Just read “Just what is an enlightened Bisexual Male?”. This was a beautiful article. And how well it describes a Bisexual Male. Loved it

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