Large Labia … Does It Matter?

Many women suffer from a poor self-image when it comes to their bodies. Though breast size seems to be less of an issue these days, there is a little discussed, more intimate issue many woman have with something that’s found between their legs. Protruding or large labia make some women so body conscious they are reluctant to have sex or let their boyfriends see them naked, especially younger women that are dating.

This article is meant to put that notion to rest. Mother Nature schemed up a grand design which was to make us all different, and therefore special to the one we eventually meet and fall in love with. Rest assured the majority of men are immensely turned-on by protruding labia. Don’t believe that? Just check out the pol at the end of this article.

For previous a post on large labia, click here.

Women with protruding labia.Small breasts and protruding labia, some people might think this girl is doomed to a lifetime of emotional trauma. Not by a long shot. Any young man walking the face of the Earth would give his eye teeth to be stranded on a deserted island with her.

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Statistical facts on female body image:

~~Only one in 10 women think that there is no shame in having discussions about the female genitals

Women with protruding labia.

~~Up to 89% of women do not think their genitals are attractive, sexy or beautiful

~~Almost half of women (47%) believe the vagina is the body part they know least about

Women with protruding labia.~~More than half (57%) of women think their genitalia is an improper size

~~Only half of women have ever performed a self-exam of their genitals, and one-quarter (24%) has not looked at her vulva in a year or longer

~~Women perceive their genitals very differently than their spouse/partner perceives their genitals

~~Since 2005, Google has reported a “Breakout” increase (more than 5000%) for numerous search terms and phrases related to female genital cosmetic surgery, including “labia surgery”, “labiaplasty”, vaginal rejuvenation”, “vagina surgery cost”, and many more. Note that each search independently increased by more than 5000%.

Women with protruding labia.~~Since 2005, Google has reported a “Breakout” increase for numerous searches related to the notion of a “normal” vulva, including “normal labia minora”, “normal labia pictures”, “normal labia size”, “normal vulva”, and many more. Note that each search independently rose by more than 5000%.

~~In 2008 the medical group Surgicare (UK) saw a threefold increase in labiaplasty over the previous year, and inquiries rose seven fold in three years. Most women asking for the surgery were in their late teens or early 20s, though as young as 10 or 11. In almost all cases, requests came from women with completely healthy vulvas, but seeking more attractive genitals.

~~Women’s genital perceptions are significantly related to their gynecological care perceptions and intentions. (In other words, if a woman has negative perceptions about her Continue reading

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The Impact of a Bisexual Husband on a Marriage.

The bisexual husband: his perspective is different from his wife’s.

The men in my novel Five Married Men not only recognize their bisexuality, they give in to their urges and act on them. Since their wives have typical perspectives on this issue, the men set up secret lives camouflaged by a system of lies. Though their wives would see their secret rendezvous as betrayal and infidelity, the men fully believe their physical intimacy with each other is apart from their marriages, and is no reflection on how much they cherish the women they married. But they know their wives would never it this way.

What begins as largely a physical attraction, soon becomes a deep emotional bond, something that fills a void in their lives, which is in addition to the love they have for their women. All of the factors in Five Married Men are not necessarily typical of married bisexual men. They are, however, things married bisexual men think about, even fantasize about, just not things they would necessarily do. In a strong loving marriage built on a foundation of time and honesty, most bisexual married men would not consider lying to their wives, let alone get involved with another man. Still, for him, something will always be missing. That’s the nature of this beast.

Therein lies a lifetime of conflicts, conflicts that often intensify as a man grows older. As the years go by, countless notions and scenarios pass through a bisexual man’s mind. While many bisexual married men can and will live out their lives scarcely impacted by their secret, more than a few find themselves wrestling with a relentless phantom. Many will contemplate talking to their wives about their bisexuality. But how would she take it? What would it do to our marriage? They think about how nice it would be to have a like-minded friend, someone to talk to, maybe even touch and participate with in some mutual exploring. They reason it all out: it wouldn’t hurt anything if she didn’t find out. It wouldn’t make me love her any less. They believe to act on their urges on some level would address their needs without harming anyone, certainly not their marriages.

But often the wife will inevitably find out. Perhaps she senses a change in his behavior, or notices something on his computer, or perhaps he will decide to confess. It’s like a bomb going off on her emotions. Very little could possibly impact her less. She is stunned, angry and confused all at the same time. She can’t believe her husband is interested in men … he’s not like that. She is shocked that he lied to her. Why didn’t he tell me before now, before we got married? She worries her marriage has been destroyed, that he will leave her for a man.

The confessions of a bisexual husband.The problem here is the two utterly different perspectives. Whereas the wife has had a bombshell go off in her life, it’s something the husband has lived with and pondered many years. To her it’s a total disaster; to him everything is essentially normal. This is where the husband has the responsibility put his perspective on hold and be especially mindful of his wife’s emotions. Understand and share her hurt. Giver her time. Let her express her emotions without arguing with them. Just listen while she vents. Find opportunities to reassure her. Let her know his love for her hasn’t changed, that he no longer wants to hide who he is from her, that he wants her to love him despite his bisexuality.

So why didn’t he tell you before you married him? First of, he should have told you. But he didn’t. Maybe because he was afraid you wouldn’t understand, that you wouldn’t marry him. Or he might have honestly believed his love for you would neutralize his bisexuality. It might have been because he was young and still ashamed of the same-sex urges he felt due of his upbringing. Also, being young and in love, a giddy time in anyone’s life, he was probably too caught up in how he felt about you to even be thinking about those errant fantasies about men. Whatever his reason, a new hand has been dealt and the wife now has to not only deal with it, but also figured out which direction her marriage should go.

Days or weeks after the initial shock wears off, the time eventually comes to sensibly talk it out, to reestablish the marriage under new circumstances and mutually agree to the parameters. Those parameters will vary radically from one couple to the next. Most wives will not want to share their husband with anyone, period. Most women, though they are able to accept their husbands bisexuality, they will not be able to accept his acting on it, no matter what. She will want a commitment from him to agree to this, which gives the husband virtually no choice … he had made this pledge in his wedding vows. Then she will likely want to put the matter out of her mind and back into the closet. I believe, if the marriage is built on a solid, loving foundation, most men will love their wives enough to play by the rules. Even then, in time, a woman’s point-of-view and attitude may evolve.

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YOU ARE A WOMAN MARRIED TO A BISEXUAL MAN. (check 0ne)

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Some women will see things differently. Some women will graciously accept their husband’s bisexuality, see it in a positive light, want to know more, have many questions. Again, there are as many variations of acceptance as there are women. Acceptance may end with simple curiosity, coupled with his assurance to remain faithful. But as you can see by the pol (above) results, for some women acceptance goes further than curiosity. Continue reading

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Fit Nude Men … Athletic Male … Part Four

Fit Nude MenVery little is more pleasing to the eye than fit nude men that live in bodies with practically no body fat, not that the same doesn’t hold true for physically fit women. Yes, it takes effort, determination and a certain amount of personal pride, all of which are in competition with a long lazy afternoon in the easy chair, ice cream and chocolate cake. As for myself, I do a good bit of bike riding, use the treadmill (a fast walk) for 30 minutes several times a week, do push-ups and sit-ups, and own a good weight machine; yet my waistline is two or three inches over what it should be. That’s because I simply cannot resist a hearty bowl of chocolate ice cream, not to mention I’m old enough to remember the first time a radio station here in Dallas played a song by a newcomer by the name of Jimi Hendrix. What an amazing experience that was.

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Girls With A Difference … Transsexual Females

Pre-op transsexual women.

A transsexual female relates the emotional trials of transition.

Out shopping one day, shortly after I turned sixteen, I walked down a well-lit hallway that led to the public restrooms. Rounding a turn in the hall, the two doors came into view on opposite walls. Before turning away from the women’s room, as I stared at the door, quick flashes of a more Utopian life passed through my mind. A middle-age woman glanced my way before disappearing inside. It would have felt natural to follow her in, though that would have made her gasp in horror.

Pre-op transsexual women.That’s because I still looked like a man, barely a year out of a late puberty. Not a masculine man, a wimpy one. Still, during puberty, my body had changed in a way that broke my heart. When the other girls at school were looking at their new breasts in the mirror, I was looking at a penis that had gotten larger.

Pre-op transsexual women.Call it a temporary lapse, me wanting to forget my body’s configured differently than the other women that use that room. Given certain circumstances, I would have these fleeting fantasies of feeling normal; usually followed by memories of the day my mother, after catching me looking at myself in the mirror in a pair of nylon panties, went through every drawer in my room and threw out all the female intimates I had hidden; or those days in junior high PE class, changing into those awful gym shorts, invariably humiliated when Johnny Perkins taunted me, mocked my slender hairless body, my girlie white skin, my small boyish penis.

Pre-op transsexual women.It was my sense of self, my feminine sensibilities that urged me to use the restroom I felt most comfortable in, instead of facing the lifelong dread of making myself go in and pee with the men. It didn’t matter the rest of my world saw me as a man, for me it was impossible to accept. It didn’t matter my shoulders were small and my protruding nipples sometimes felt swollen and sensitive, as if they were about to blossom into full blown breasts (but never did); I was stuck with the basic shape of a male. It didn’t matter if I secretly shaved my underarms and legs; I still looked like a man. But I’m not. Not then, that day at Macy’s; not now. I’m a woman. Born a woman and destined to stay a woman for the rest of my life.

Pre-op transsexual women.I had been looking at the swimsuits in Macy’s, wondering what I would look like in a stringy two piece, never mind being almost decade away from all the necessary treatments and operations. I would do things like that to escape the tormenting world I lived in, always checking to make sure no one who knew me was in the store before holding something up in front of the mirror to see how it would look on me.

Pre-op transsexual women.So how do I describe the conflicts that haunted me every time my parents looked at me with unspoken questions and doubt; every time the boys mocked me and called me a sissy while the girls looked on with detached pity; every time I saw a dress in a store window I’d love to try on, but to do so meant I must be a pervert; every time my eyes fell on a boy’s lips I would love to kiss, only to realize kissing me was the last thing he would want to do? Continue reading

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Strap-ons … A Man’s Secret Fantasy

Strap-ons. Do Men (boyfriends/husbands) secretly wish their girlfriend/wife would use one?

This question from a reader:

I was wondering your thoughts on women using strap-ons on their male partners. I rather enjoy this and find it helps with my bi urges.

Women who use strap-ons.My reply:

Whether we realize it or not, whether we want to admit it or even consider it, our anuses are are part of our sexual persona and a remarkable source of pleasure. It is also a part of our body many of us have been programmed to believe is taboo, dirty or objectionable. For a different view see a previous post entitled: Anuses … The Mysterious Taboo.

Women who use strap-ons.Of course by including your and/or your partner’s anus in an evening of romantic adventure doesn’t have to mean anal intercourse. It can simply involve caresses, fingers and tongues, or perhaps a well designed toy. Let me assure you that this has the potential to add a dimension to your relationship that will take you and your partner to a whole new level of intimacy.

Women who use strap-ons.But the question here has to do with women using a strap-on, which means she is going to fuck you instead of you fucking her for a change. This is where the notion stops for most guys. They worry, by suggesting a strap-on penis, their wife/girlfriend will think they aregay (no doubt a good many women would). Secondly, they can’t even imagine how to bring a subject like this up. Or maybe the guy himself thinks it’s a gay thing and wouldn’t consider anything inserted into his anus, let alone a fake penis. Even if he has considered it, wouldn’t it hurt?

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For Women ... Would You Use a Strap-on?

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For Men ... Would You Want Your Lady to Use a Strap-on?

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Tattoos, No Inhibitions … Man & Ink

Nude men with tattoos.

Tattoos are a subjective subject. Some believe Mother Natures design for the male form be left as it is. Others, for various reasons, think tattoos not only enhance the human body but also make a statement about about a guy’s personal identity. Where are you on the subject? The following pols should give us some answers to where this trend has taken us.

Nude men with tattoos.

Do You Have A Tattoo?

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Does Your Partner Have A Tattoo?

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What Kind of Tattoo(s) Do you Like? (choose up to 3)

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Nude men with tattoos.

Tattoos For Women (choose up to 4)

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Male Underwear … Sexy is a Man Wearing White Cotton Briefs

Men wearing underwear.Male underwear. The question is whether or not to wear it when you may feel freer without it. Then again, male underwear can lend support. Male underwear can be absorbent, which helps you avoid the appearance of a wet spot on your pants after you urinate. Male underwear can also help facilitate an appealing bulge in your jeans. And there is the undeniable fact that male underwear can be awfully sexy.

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Naked Men Having Fun

Why do men like being naked with other naked men?

These photographs will explain it.
Men getting naked with other naked men.No, you don’t have to be gay to enjoy getting naked with other naked men. You don’t have to be bisexual. You don’t have to be beautiful, ripped with muscles or well hung. You do have to be alive … and be a guy. Naked men are simply men in their natural state, finding themselves in the right place with the right circumstances to let go of all their old self-conscious baggage.

Men getting naked with other naked men.It might be in the hot tub in the locker room at the gym. It might be at the Friday night poker game at one of the guy’s house, or his backyard swimming pool. It might be on a camping trip and during an afternoon swim in the river, or a remote hiking trail in a secluded state park.

Men getting naked with other naked men.Here the guys are rinsing off after peddling the route at the World Naked Bike Ride.

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Men getting naked with other naked men.Getting naked with the guys is not for everyone. Social taboos stand in the way. Some men are guided by their machismo. I’m sure religious doctrine often precludes even thinking about it. Other guys simply don’t see the point.

Men getting naked with other naked men.But for those who recognize the benefits of this kind of male bonding, who feel the sense of adventure, who appreciate the gratification such friendships provide and of being naked with other naked men, the experience adds a new dimension to life.

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Men getting naked with other naked men.. Continue reading

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